I just realized something after so long being in the dark

I'm not fit to be loved, nor to even love

Don't understand? Nevermind
I've said enough

-Signing off-
Posted on 12:22 PM by Jeffery Chan and filed under | 2 Comments »

I've lost my light, my dream.

There are phrases in games in which I think is very inspirational and I can remember 2 phrases which was actually in my mind all along. Think I'm gonna share with my readers (If there are any) today about it.

Still searching for the light? Well, don't lose sight of it - Auron - Kingdom Hearts II
The most important thing is to embrace your dreams - Angeal - FFVII :Crisis Core

Unfortunately, I'm here without any light and dreams right now. Somehow, I tend to lose hold of whatever I had for the whole Sem-1. The pressure is too much and I seriously felt that I can't handle it anymore. Sometimes, I just feel like giving up once and for all but knowing of the things I've done and the people who put their hopes up for me. I simply can't just do so. But, I can't find the reason anymore

Everyone sees me as someone 'special' in whatever I do now. I don't like it
I used to take my education in a very fun way. Now, it evolved into a burden

I really want to go back to the old me. Whereby I can actually be the same as last time. There are people who actually told me not to think so much as I'm just thinking too much for the past 1-2 months. I've tried, and I think I failed in it badly.

-Signing off-

Searching for the light

Posted on 2:00 PM by Jeffery Chan and filed under | 1 Comments »

Sharing is caring, NOT

Sharing and caring.
A phrase that everyone loves to say especially when they want to get something from you.
I believe I don't need to explain much about it since most of you would've known about it
But, I believe that sometimes, this phrase is overused.
Simply because somethings can't be shared and should NOT be shared between two users
It's always best to get things cleared sometimes but I do not know why it is so hard.

Sighs, I dont even know what am I typing now.
Perhaps one day, things would be made clear and thus I can actually sleep.
I can't bear it trying to sleep every night but ended up thinking what is happening on the other side.

What am I to do?

-Signing off-

I seriously don't know what am I heading towards anymore
Things I thought I can handle ended up the opposite way I wanted
Getting more and more aggressive and hot headed these days.

Please, help me
Posted on 10:17 PM by Jeffery Chan and filed under | 1 Comments »


Learnt a new word today.
It's called
Don't know what it is?
It's very simple.
You just have to look at me and you'll see this word
Something in which I want to change but I don't think it'll ever change.

Just a post to release my weird thoughts
Thoughts in which I can never control

-Signing off-

Posted on 12:28 AM by Jeffery Chan and filed under | 0 Comments »

Adventures of Lamerz

This is the story of a 3 lamers who went to Kampar to visit another 4 lamers. Shall we see what's happening in this lame adventure? Anyway, the credits are to Mr. Lamey. Lets enjoice the story

Yesterday, a trip was organized by lameey to kampar ..
Together, Lamey brough Lame fat and Lame lai together with him.
Lame sleeper came n meet us outside when we arrived,
Together we went to lame thin's room

At lame thin's house,
Lame sleeper wanted to scare him and ask Lamey, Lame fat and Lame lai hide under the starirs
But the 3 of them =.= at Lame sleeper
Lame lai started to say WoW when he say lame thin's toilet
Then lame fat sat at lame thin's jacket
Lame thin went O.O
Lamey tried to get some food
And lame thin also went =.=
Lame sleeper always hit lame fat chest
After 1~2 hours of chat at lame thin's room
Then lame lai suddenly talk bout hair leg
Lame fat start showing off his leg
Lame sleeper then go ENOUGH!!!

As the lamers are going back
Lamey notice there r 7 bicycle 2 motorbike and 1 car
Lamey also noticed there is a very mini bbq by the house
Lamey noticed that all the houses r the same

Lame sleeper decided to show off his room
So.. he asked us to go to his place
Lamey entered his room
And started to play the most famous game in the world..
Left 4 dead
At lame sleeper's room
He had a fishing rod
Lame Lai was wandering wat he do with that coz there is no place to go fishing
So we assume that lame sleeper try to use that fishing rod to hook women
lame fat then show us a dumb choir at youtube
Lts related to a complain
Lamey came just to meet lame thin n lame sleeper
But lame bone was there
So 3 of them came with us
To eat at some chinese restaurant

At the entrance, lamey realise the entrance to the place is retarded
With small place to enter
There come great mind
Where lamey starts to enter with his "pro" skill of driving
Finally they reached,
The 6 lamer sat down
And slowly order food
After that
Food came
And all the lamers started to eating
After finish eating
The lamers start to pay bill
Where lame fat dunno how to count
Then after tat
Lame thin took the rm5 and split with lame bone
Lamey wanted to buy kacang
So he took at rm4 to buy
Lame sleeper n Lame thin share RM10 and bought so bloody 3 big packets
Then all the lamers entered lamey's car
Lamey drop them back to their prison
Lame thin's prison first
Then lame bone's
Finally lame sleeper

Lame hao cannot attend the reunion that day -Sadz-
-Signing off-
Posted on 11:10 AM by Jefferychan and filed under | 0 Comments »


Day after day
Time pass away
And I just can't get you off my mind
Nobody knows ... I hide it inside
I keep on searching but I can't find
The courage to show ...
To letting you know ...
I've never felt so much love before
And once again I'm thinking about
Taking the easy way out ...

But if I let you go
I will never know
What my life would be
Holding you close to me
Will I ever see
You smiling back at me
How will I know?
If I let you go ...

Night after night
I hear myself sayin'
Why can't this feeling just fade away?
There's no one like you
You speak to my heart
It's such a shame we're worlds apart
I'm too shuy to ask
I'm too proud to lose
But sooner or later I gotta choose
And once again I'm thinking about
Taking the easy way out ...

Once again I'm thinking about ....
Taking the easy way out ....
Posted on 8:53 PM by Jefferychan and filed under | 0 Comments »

Out of nothing

Each day ends with memories
Memories in which people remember
But during this rainy night
Nothing, I plan to remember
But the past, I shall

1st June 2009
The start of something new
In UTAR, Kampar.
Monday was the day,
10.00am was the time
Here, I'd actually met you.
And thus starts my story
Joy and sorrow alike.

Day by day,
classes by classes.
Trying to get to know you
Was it by chance or by fate?
You were in my assignment group
There, I thought there was hope
Up till the moment of truth
Cruel facts are discovered
I was just too late

Sad was I, indeed
Disappointment enveloped all
There was no light to be seen
But it was then, I've decided to create
The ray of light of my own
I call that,


It was hope that endured all
It was hope that kept me going
It was hope that brought joy
It was hope that gave me a path
But it was hope that gave great disappointment

Time passes by
We got closer to each other
And thats the maximum point
I can't hold onto my feelings any longer
In the end, I confessed everything

Happy or sad
It turned out not as bad
It was a two-way relationship
The ray of light I once had tend to shine

But I didn't know
it was the ray of warning
Warning of pain
Warning of sorrow
Warning of sadness
Warning of suffering

Ignoring the warning was my decision
Thus, the consequences was for me to bear
Everything that happened all along

It's all because of me

I'm sorry

-Signing off-
Posted on 12:46 AM by Jefferychan and filed under | 1 Comments »


Love is not by finding the perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly

I wonder if it's actually true? Frankly, I disagree with this. I believe I failed in this and I'll only believe in things in which I can see. Thus I conclude, this phrase is a scam. Do not believe in it.

Just a short post to digest myself from everything today
Am I emo you're asking? Well, yeah

-Signing off-

Tomorrow is gonna be a long long day

Posted on 9:44 PM by Jefferychan and filed under | 3 Comments »

Out of boredom

Hiya all,
Since I'm just too bored now and I have an internet line, I think I'm just gonna update this blog a little. Currently listening to the song "October" and well, I think it suits my current feeling and situation at this moment of time. To be frank, I do not know what I want to type when i started to get into this blog but well, urrh. It doesn't matter. I just need to find some things to do to make myself busy.

I think I need to wake up. I can't indulge myself into this slumber anymore. Sad to say, I failed in this because I got sick yesterday and up till today, I can't get my mechanism in my body to function well enough to wake up (I almost skipped todays lecture/tutorials) xD. So much for the 4.0 =.= Giving me the stress out of nothing.

On a brighter note, Chee cheng is coming to meet up with the Kampar gang on wednesday!! Well, it SHOULD be something to be happy about isnt it? Just hope I don't get some last-minute-oh-my-gosh-assignment-group-discussion or I'm gonna piss them off. XD

On the other hand, I believe that I can finally rest my case, with an open heart. I think this is the end of my story, playing this particular role which I want to play but lack the capabilities to do so. And, if you think this post is emo, do look at the older post. This is actually an emotionless post. Which I dont even know whether I should be happy or sad

-Signing off-

P/s :- If you realised, I didn't really post pictures in my blog anymore. Well, mainly it's because my camera phone have a 1.3mp camera. Which means, there's no point taking lame pictures with ugly resolution. Wait till I get a camera or a new phone

Posted on 9:01 PM by Jefferychan and filed under | 0 Comments »


It's been my 3rd week being in my second trimester here in Kampar and well things are actually almost the same. The only difference is that my PC went turtling and my line is as usual, slower than anyone would have expected. Anyway, nothing much to post actually but I think I just have to post to keep this blog alive.

Things that I'd actually did for the past 3 weeks:-
  • Went for lectures and tutorial as usual.
  • Paid my fees, a whole sum of Rm xxxx.
  • Joined the boardgames club in UTAR (proud?).
  • Met some cute and pretty chicks (LoL).
  • I think I became stronger, physically and emotionally.
Just gotta keep pushing myself to the limits. I'm having a test in 2 weeks time and well, some lecturers are better known as photostating machine or a radio but well, lets give them time and see if there's any changes. Future things which would take place??
  • Andrew and Kelly's wedding!! Gosh I'm gonna miss this. Tomorrow :( Congrats anyway
  • Management test (Week 5)
  • Marketing test (Week 6)
  • Writing for business test (Week 6)
Uhhh, appreciate the time u have. You'll never know when would it be taken away from you. For some particular person, hope you're alright after tonight and continue to live life to the fullest!! Perhaps I'll end this post just like that. Not in the mood and I'm afraid that my line would go "buh-bai" again.

-Signing off-

Nothing to hope for but just that you're happy
If you are happy indeed, I'm satisfied!

Posted on 10:52 PM by Jefferychan and filed under | 1 Comments »

Being ordinary

Sometimes, I just wished to be ordinary.
Being all the same with the people around me
I ponder and ponder many times
Why I'd be the outstanding one?
It caused rather more harm than good

Enough said
I want to be ordinary
Posted on 4:49 PM by Jeffery Chan and filed under | 0 Comments »

Kampar! I'm back

Selamat sejahtera saya ucapkan kepada pembaca-pembaca blog saya yang setia ini =) Selepas kian lama menghilangkan diri di dalam sejak seminggu yang lepas, aku amat gembira dan bangga untuk memberitahu anda semua bahawa saya telahpun kembali kepada dunia blogging ini. Aku amatlah merindui masa yang saya guna untuk blog tapi sejak seminggu yang lalu, aku amat sibuk apabila aku pulang ke Kampar bukanlah dengan P & P tetapi dengan mengayuh basikal dan tidur macam babi di rumah aku.
Greetings to my fellow loyal and supportive blog reader =). After being missing for about a week, I'm glad and is proud to say that I'm back to the blogging world. Had really been missing in blogging but I was extremely busy when I get myself back to Kampar but it wasn't because of my academics but it's basically with cycling, feasting on food and also dozing off aka sleeping like pigs in my room.

Uh, I tried my best to practice the 1Malaysia thing by writing in Bahasa. It seems that my Malay is getting bad and bad because I seemed to forget every single word. Even the word "busy" took me 30 seconds of recall. Sighs, but nevermind! It's a great start I must say. For the 'international' readers (which I believe there are none of them), in case you don't understand Malay, you can read the English subtitle in italic

Anyway, allow me to continue writing in English since I think I can write better and express my gratitude and feelings better in English. Well, I've actually finished week 1 of my second semester in the foundation course already. If you are wondering what's my timetable because you want to clash into my class on purpose or just to stalk me, here's my time table =). Uh, well the timetable is actually on top and not on the bottom. So, start scrolling!

Anyway, there's been ups and downs during this week and well, I do believe things happen for a reason and I'm glad that things turned out okay in the end too. To cut things short, there's but ONE thing for me to remember and cherish throughout the week. Not exactly a week but on the 20th October 2009. What day is that? Well, I think it's my birthday. Wasn't actually expecting much this year but things turned out great! Some of my ex-classmates actually did a birthday celebration for me. Was seriously shocked and happy (most of the time shy) at that time so I didn't talk much but I really do appreciate it. I'll let the picture do the talking from here.

Seems that I can celebrate Deepavali at the same time =)

Cake cutting

I just had some make-up by Gwee =) Did I mention it's free?

Zombie style, most of the girls don't want to be in the photo. Shy-nya

Seriously, thanks for the Tb-6-ers who came and spend your time although you people are having like 8am class the next day! Thanks!! And also, thanks to the SMS-es, Facebook messages and wall writing even from someone whom I never expect it to come from. Thanks ya all!! I'll try to list them down, but hopefully I dont miss anyone. If I do, sorry =(

Cai Jun
Ting Yuan
Yen Yen
Zian Sing
Victor Chu
Jackie Oo
Louis chong (my "happy partner")
Jordan Chin
Jonathan Kee
Amin Haikal
Siew Wei
Mei Kuan
Tjun Kong
Allan Hoo
Lai May
Jackie Wong
Samuel Tong
Shiau Suang
Joshua Chan
June Ling
Thing Yin
Wai Keong
Joshua Chen
Joe Wai
Yuk Jing
Kok weng
Hoe Yin
Seng Hoo
家慧 (don't know ur English name)
Seresuchie Kanderakaru Gurikupumod (this is even weird)
Wei Ken
Pei Vern
Yan Hoe
Keh Guan
Kee Keat
Yit Guan
Sai Kit
Syed Roshan
Abdul Halim
Aaron Oo
Joel Ho
Lu Yau
Hon Kit
Adwin Chow
Ms Devagi!! (My Accounting Lecturer/Tutor)

Phone Sms-es
Wei Yee
Tihn Chern
Chee Fei
Suet yin
Wei Hao
Ee Yen
Kar Kheng
Shing Yih

Phew, perhaps that's the list. There is actually some people in particular that I want to thank but I think it's not really the right place. Whoever you are, I believe you know who you are. Thanks for everything you had given to me all along. I'm really very glad with it. Thanks!! What's my birthday wish? Well, I'm not telling but continue guessing. You may strike a jackpot.

I guess that's all for now. The next time I'm blogging, I'm going to blog about, some random stuffs perhaps. Not really free these days due to my Pig-ism.

-Signing off-

P/s :- I love all of you!! If you understand what I mean. I mean you
Posted on 11:27 PM by Jeffery Chan and filed under | 4 Comments »

Attire changed!

Well, if you have normal eye sight like mine, you would realize that my blog changed it's attire since last night. Well, I kinda woke up too early in the morning with nothing to do, so I ended up looking around the net for some templates and well, I think I found a template of my favour. Therefore, I ended up spending the whole morning working on this template and this is the result of it. In case you still can't see whats different in my template, I'm posting it right here.

I changed my blog template and it had evolved from the ohsoblue template to the ohsoblack template as you can see as you are reading this post. Duh! Well, up to now, I'm satisfied with the outcome as I do not have much hazzle compared to the past time especially in retrieving information and linking blogs again and again but if I do miss you out in the blogroll, do post it up in the comment section. Not chatbox =)

Oh yeah, I can't seem to put the CSS code for borders for pictures as you can see in this post. Any good samaritan willing to help me out and insert the dumb border?? Had been trying for the past 30 mins and I can't find the correct position to put the code. Arrghh!! Well, will keep my readers updated in the future but not now because I'm lazy! Yes, I'm lazy. What do you expect? I'm in my SEM BREAK now so it's normal to be lazy.

- Signing off-
Posted on 8:20 AM by Jeffery Chan and filed under | 3 Comments »

Sem 1 accomplished.

Well, as stated in the title above. My sem 1 in my foundation course in UTAR is officially completed with the release of the results for the final examinations. What my results are? Well, I'm satisfied with it and I need not to expose it to anyone so you're not gonna know it. *evil laughs*. If you beg me good enough them maybe I'm gonna tell you but I doubt it'll happen.

I still remember my old post about some lame equations which goes like this
Work hard + work smart + luck = Success

Seems that its true as it's proven by me now. Mwahahaha .

Just a rather short post to fill in the blanks as I wait for someone to online although my eyes aren't feeling good now. Rubbed it too much I guess, typical red and watery eyes of mine would never be cured. Sighs. Oh yeah, I'm taking my undang test finally after delaying it for like 1 year? Hahaha, lets see how it goes bah

-Signing off-
Posted on 3:57 PM by Jefferychan and filed under | 0 Comments »

Head or Heart??

It'd been more than one week since my holidays after completing sem 1 of my foundation course in UTAR. Since it's a holiday, usually I'll just use up all the time I have in games of Dota, whatever it is, you name it and I'll be playing that game. Ironically, things doesn't go this way this time. I simply spent my time sleeping and lazing around because gaming ain't my passion anymore.

I prefer to go out and hangout with people and friends I have
I prefer to get out of my house and start doing things I'd never do
I prefer to spend my time on more realistic things and not virtual things

Despite all the things I actually wanted to do, I did none of them. Frankly, none of them, had I accomplished and did. The reason why? Well, I do not know of the reason causing things like this to happen. I do not know what is actually happening because there are a lot of things that my heart tells me to do, yet I didn't because my head tells me not to do. What do I actually want now? Should I follow my heart? or follow my head.

I always question myself why do I actually think so much before something is actually being done at all. Is there a need of an answer or the effect before an action is being carried out? Or sometimes reasons ain't important at all? I'm confused. Why am I always in the "different, unique or weird" category of people and not of the majority?

A quote that came into my mind when I was pondering upon many things just now

You can tell a child that the fire is hot and it'll burn,
but if the child don't touch fire himself/herself,
the child would never understand the meaning of 'hot' forever

-Signing off-

Posted on 2:33 AM by Jefferychan and filed under | 0 Comments »

Back in Ipoh

Well, after many weeks of studying and the 6 exams paper being completed since the past 2 weeks. I'm glad to say that I'm finally back in Ipoh for my semester break. Didn't actually count the days of how long I'll be back here in Ipoh but I'll most probably be here up till the 18th since my next sem starts at the 19th October. Which is, 1 day before my birthday. Great, seems that I'm celebrating my birthday in Kampar (not that I usually celebrate it in Ipoh either way).

Alright, so what am I up to since 2 days ago?
Well, due to the fact that my internet connection in Kampar is SO slow, of course, the first thing to do is to download everything I can and I want and this includes lots of songs, lots of videos and lots and lots of games. Oh yeah, did anyone tell you that I actually 'bought' myself a birthday present?

If not, well, I bought a PSP-3002 just few days back
Perhaps that explains why am I downloading so much *ahem*
I think you get what I mean anyway

Perhaps that's all for now, can't type much since what I do everyday is download, eat and sleep. I'm replaying Kingdom Hearts II also since Kingdom Hearts 358/2 is coming out followed by the one in the PSP. I'm gonna go ahead and finish all this when it comes out. At the meantime, let me finish Kingdom Hearts II again first.

Kingdom Hearts 358/2 days - Roxas' story

I think that's all for now, I'll continue to update this in the near future when there's anything worth remembering or perhaps when Aliens start attacking planet earth. That would be when you can be sure of a post in my blog

-Signing off-

Been days since we've parted
I'd missed every single moment we spent
The joy, sorrow, pain and enjoyment
That's what kept me moving on
I'll remember it forever and ever
I just want to let you know
I <3 U

P/s :- I'm still not used to use the PC in the living room. When I'm blogging, I felt like being watched and I certainly don't like this!

Posted on 1:03 AM by Jefferychan and filed under | 7 Comments »

Your's or not?

I've been thinking a lot these days on the recent happenings around. Perhaps I've been thinking too much or maybe I just enjoy thinking far beyond what I should actually think of. Sometimes I do wonder whether the principals which I held on all these years are correct, or wrong. Rather, I'm quite clear in some of the "realities" which are happening in the current world now

Had you ever gave your everything in something you want the most and end up getting none? All these while, I have the belief that nothing is impossible and as long as you do not give up, things would eventually fall into place if there's an effort being laid. But well, now I know whats the gospel truth behind that. It can be explained with only one phrase

If it's meant to be yours, it'll be yours eventually no matter what happens.
If it isn't, sad to say that it'll never be yours no matter what you do.


I think I've been taught this phrase the very harsh way. Harsh up till the extent of me not even able to stand up on my own feet once again but well, I think I've stood up now so everything is actually history. Life is like that sometimes.

Perhaps another phrase of mine would go like this

The good will always be the one left behind
The evil and cunning continues to move forward.

Is it the truth or not?
Well, I do not know but it seems to be true to me

-Signing off-
Posted on 9:32 PM by Jefferychan and filed under | 3 Comments »

I'm okay

Big apologies to my crazy post yesterday, wasn't in a good form I guess. Anyhow, everything had calmed down I guess and well, I can't say that I've recovered totally and is able to continue on without problem. Sometimes, things just can't be healed like this. It's just gonna be a scar in my life from now on. Sometimes, life is just unfair.

Things that you dislike and hate would come into your life one by one
Things in which u want and hope it'll come true, will never appear in your life at all

Perhaps that's the cruel fact of this world
To those who are wondering what am I talking about, (I know you people are blur). Yes, I'm facing this problem known as the BGR. If you understand it, then you'll probably understand. If not, well go google around. Sometimes, you just have to put in some effort to find out things.
One single fact which I'm very sure is this,
I'm not giving up this easily.
I'm going to continue moving on

I believe I need not to explain this anymore.
I've my reasons and it's very clear for me.

Life's tough,
Perhaps I should had gone back to the past and enjoy my kids' life

One a brighter note,
The final paper for this trimester is this Wednesday(23/9/09)
After that, I'm getting out of this place for good
Perhaps I need a break too.

-Signing off-
Posted on 12:13 PM by Jefferychan and filed under | 3 Comments »

Quotes representing me

It's now 6.35am and the clock is still ticking.
I'm blogging now but it's not because I woke up too early,
it's just that I didn't sleep at all.
I do not know whether I should be happy or not from these circumstances
Being awakened from a dream I don't want to be awakened from.

"Love can sometimes be magic. But magic can sometimes... just be an illusion."

Indeed, at this moment of time, I simply have no one to refer to anymore.
I used to have you to look and refer to when there are problems and ordeals
But it seems that it won't work in this case.

"Who do you turn to when the only person who can stop you from crying,
is the one who is making you cry?"


I really do not know whether I should be happy because I've met you or not.
For you really brought joy into my life, yet the worst sorrow I've ever faced.
Sometimes I do wonder, should I be happy or sad?

"Should I smile because you're my friend, or cry because that's all you'll be?"

You told me in many ways that you loved me.
I believed in it and I never doubted it.
But, what's the use of it now?

"So you love me, but you just don't want me?"

Comparing with loads of people we've saw, everyone says that we match up well
Sadly, I've got to known you too late.
IF everything were to be earlier,
would the situation be better?

"We are the perfect couple, we're just not in the perfect situation."

Just some quotes of sadness for those who share the same sorrow with me.
I have one more paper for my final examinations,
wish me luck in pursuing my target
Till then, good bye

-Signing off-

"If I had never met you.
I wouldn't like you.
If I had never liked you,
I would have never loved you.
If I had never loved you,
I'd never miss you.
But I did, I do, and I will.

Posted on 6:51 AM by Jefferychan and filed under | 2 Comments »

Exams ahead!

Had been wanting to update this blog these few days but I end up slacking off and falling asleep in the end. Anyway, I would be having my final exams from tomorrow onwards up to 23th of this month and then well, I'll be back in Ipoh! Hope to get hooked on with my friends in Ipoh when I get back and at the same time feeling sad because I won't be in the same class with most of my old Tb-6 classmates anymore due to the screwed up system of UTAR

Went to Golden Sand with most of the Tb6-er and well, it might be the last

I've finally obtained all of my coursework marks.
Not very satisfied with it but well, it'll do well I guess and hopefully
Public Speaking - 42.1/50
Mass Comm
- 34.1/40
Accounting - 32.3/40
- 35.95/40
- 33.2/40
- 40.25/50
Conclusion of the coursework marks?
Well, to get A for all subjects, I need to score at least 80/100 for the final exam
Can't say that I'm ready for the exam but I think I've did my part
Just hope and pray that everything goes on well!
Or else, I'll go nuts and start jumping off from the second floor!
-Signing off-

To dream, to endure and to wait
Hoping for changes to take place
I can't imagine any possibilities ahead


I'll be right here waiting

Because I believe it's worth trying
Posted on 2:38 AM by Jefferychan and filed under | 7 Comments »

Happy Birthday!

It's been quite some time since I last updated and now I'm back with a dedication post for someone's birthday which obviously, falls today (2nd September 2009)
Who's that you're asking?
Well, it's

My mummy's birthday!! =)

Well, nothing much to write but I would like to dedicate this post to you.
Indeed, I know that being some 'annoying' kid in this family, I've caused a lot of problem
Thanks for being so patient in bringing me up until this stage. (I know its not easy)
Now that I'm away, perhaps it's time for me to carry on moving forward.
Thank you for everything you've done for me!!
I love ya!!!

Happy Birthday Mom!!

P/s:- Don't kill me cuz I've uploaded this picture coz I just realised that I do not have much pictures of you and me together. Sighs, really need to take some soon.

Posted on 8:55 AM by Jefferychan and filed under | 0 Comments »

Calm before the storm

Well, it's been a while (perhaps just a little while) since my last post and I'm glad to say that I'm still alive and happy here in Kampar. Currently undergoing my 13th week out of 14 week of studies and lecture and well, we are all now preparing for a war. Whats the war called? It's called end term exam. Hahaha. Anyway, to cut the crap, I've finished all assignments and presentation and I'm glad that it's over, for now I'll have a whole load of crap assignments the next trimester

As usual, Tb-Sixers cam-whoring session after presentations are normal
Lets have a look at the pictures

My group for Computer studies (Xue Ying is missing though)

Jackie, Jeffery, Sharon and Hands(Wai Keong)

Some shoes (guess which is mine) -.-

Jeffery and S.H.E. =)

Uh, I know I'm lame but the camera-MAN is lamer :)

Anyway, as the title stated

The calm had begun
Students starts to get indulged in books
People like me starts to get lame and sick
All used to prepare themselves for this day
Final exam day

OK I'm crapping a lot
Seems that blogger doesn't want me anymore here so tata!

-Signing off-

Putting back everything aside
Patiently waiting for the day to come
Hoping for a change in everything
Surely, there would be no regrets

Posted on 1:42 AM by Jefferychan and filed under | 4 Comments »

Letting go

Perhaps this is the word which I should use to express myself now.
I do realise that sometimes, thing meant to be will always meant to be
Opposing it, things aren't meant to be will never meant to be yours.
Rather than to continue to pursue this particular 'pain'
Why not stop all this meaningless pain?

It ain't supposed to happen in the first place
Why did I put this meaningless dream into this particular picture?
Perhaps, this is the only way to solve this problem

I'm cruel?
Well, perhaps so. But this is the only way to stop things from happening again.

-Signing off-

Now it's time to face the truth
I will never be with you
Now that it had come into this situation
All that I can say is "I love you"
Sorry for the trouble I've caused
It's time to end everything

Posted on 4:26 PM by Jefferychan and filed under | 0 Comments »


Simplicity mainly exist in the mind of the young and also babies
As for us teen and adults, simplicity is something which would never exist in our life
Somehow, I do wonder what would happen if everything in this world is so simple that it's either

Yes or No
or Wrong
Joy or Sorrow

How good would it be if everything on earth would be this simple.
By having this kind of simplicity, one wouldn't have to waste so much time on hopeless questions
I wouldn't have to think so much either on so many things happening around me
Just a short post this time to allow me to continue thinking

-Signing off-

Pondering upon the midnight star
Hoping for the best to reveal far
But if it doesn't happen
What ought can ever be done?

Posted on 12:21 AM by Jefferychan and filed under | 0 Comments »

Over the limits

Had you ever felt that all things are actually getting onto your nerves?
Things which you think that had gotten better turns out the opposite?
Everything positive evolves into something so bad?
You think that this is bad enough? Think again because

Worst of all

You can't show or express it to anyone and it must be kept a secret!!
I ain't sure how long can I deal with it anymore and sometimes I really do enjoy sleeping as it can actually solve all the problems. Allowing me to forget everything and just leave it like that, continuing my dreams in slumberland.

How good would it be if sleeping could be eternal

Mixture of feelings indulged me
One on the decision to continue pursuing
Another asked to let go of everything
What should be done?

Posted on 5:36 PM by Jefferychan and filed under | 0 Comments »

Choice making

I'm not sure of what's gotten into me but I think my blog is going to be a philosophical blog very soon if this continues on. Yeah, I realised I've been posting a lot of things in regards to philosophies and I know some people hates it but well, these are the things that comes into my mind nowadays since my life is so monotonous peaceful here in Kampar

Not sure of what am I supposed to write about but I think I wanna share some terms I learnt in my Principle of Economics class in UTAR

This simple term is actually Opportunity Cost
In simplicity, it's something that we actually sacrifice to gain something else which we want.

In life, there are just too many choice and alternatives which we can actually choose. Obviously, we can never choose all of them to be in our life but we can always make a choice on which one would we be choosing it. There are several factors which affects these decisions which includes money, self satisfaction, guilt or sometimes, there aren't any reasons at all.

But in the end, all these come into one single conclusion. We still need to make decisions and choices in our life, no matter the reason.

Some may choose to avoid
Some may choose to ignore
Some may choose to run


No one ever succeeded

I've tried it myself and it's proven, we can't escape from making choices in life
Perhaps I'm a very selfish person living on this planet,
I choose to satisfy my own needs although I try to suit the preferences of others too.

Decisions are never easy to be made
But sometimes, decisions are the only way to solve problems

Do it, take the action which you think is right
And that is all that matters in the end

It's your choice after all

Posted on 2:33 AM by Jefferychan and filed under | 1 Comments »

Slight updates

I think I need to update the blog to prevent it from dying off. I've been updating my post quite a lot lately but I end up deleting it. I wonder why do I post when I'm deleting them one by one after that? Anyway, to write more about this post. I'm here to say that I'm still alright. Although I got some running nose here and there all the time, I'm still here to say I'm healthy.

Wednesday was the economic presentation day and that's where most of my classmates and I wore our formal attire to campus. Uh, everything went well I supposed but since it's a 2 hour preparation presentation, I can't say that I'm quite and very satisfied with the result although I havent get the marks yet. Anyway, to show u what my class did after everything, I'll show u some pictures.

Yi Xiang and I

Some of the guys

KK and myself

The ones presenting on that day

Chuen Chie, Yi Xiang and Yours sincerely

To prevent your eyes from straining, I've actually deleted a few pictures in my list so that it won't appear in my blog which would strain your eyes to the extent of spoiling it. So, you do not have to worry about obscene things. Hopefully that there won't be any problem with my deleting system.


Oh nooo!!! It should be censored!!

-Signing off-

I want to be the angels in the fairytale
To turn into wings which would protect you
You must believe that we would be like the fairytales
With a 'happily ever after' ending
Posted on 10:42 AM by Jefferychan and filed under | 6 Comments »


It's now 5.03am and I have the urge to blog for no reason. Perhaps the early dozing off last night was the effect of me waking up so early, stuck at home with nothing to do actually made me feel like blogging. But, deep inside me I feel like going to the lake again to stare blankly into space and start pondering on myself but sadly, doing that would eventually make me end up having another "imaginary friend" by my side. So I'm staying at home!

7 weeks more till the end of this particular semester. I wonder what would happen in the future? I really hope that something can actually take place but I understand that is something that no one can actually decide and do something. Perhaps the word 'hope' which I posted in my previous entry is the only adrenaline which keeps me going on.


Guess I should really start to appreciate the people around me
The time that I spent with them, hopefully it'll give an impact to them
My only hope is to leave something inside them
Anything other than that, is a bonus

-Signing off-

Cause everytime we touch, I get this feeling.
And everytime we kiss I swear I could fly.
Can't you feel my heart beat fast, I want this to last.
Need you by my side.

Posted on 5:00 AM by Jefferychan and filed under | 1 Comments »

Adrenaline of mine

I believe everyone of us have something to pursue. Something that we really want and something that we actually strive for. No doubt that things would never be easy to be obtained and well, that is the cruel fact that everyone of us, including myself have to admit. Yet the question is, why do people still manage to gather all their strength and energy to go for it? what is the adrenaline that cause us to move forward and face all the problems that would cause pain and sorrow to us?

Perhaps, the adrenaline of this particular thing is called hope. A hope that there would be a change. A hope that something would happen. A hope that there's always a way to move forward and a hope which everyone believe that things will change if there's a will. Nothing is impossible perhaps? I'm not too sure about that.

But, I do believe that hope exist and am believing in its existence up till now.
And I'm will wait for this hope to unveil.

-Signing off-

I wonder how we can survive

This romance
But in the end if I'm with you
I'll take the chance
Posted on 5:57 PM by Jefferychan and filed under | 2 Comments »

The true value

It's once again whereby I have too much time to use up since I'm not in the form to study, nor in a form to do research for my presentations next week. In the end, I end up being in a dilemma in getting the correct definition for the word value. Not very much into the definition but on which particular thing we should put our value into.

Business minded people would be asking us to put our value into things which would bring profit to us. Things that don't bring any benefit or good results to us should not be done because it would only waste our time.

Religious groups would be asking us to put our value into things above rather than the things in this world. Things on earth is actually temporary and it don't make much difference since at the end of the day, we would only get to look at it, not owning it at all.

There are also some other groups which claim that the experience is the most important and valuable things which we can get in our life. The outcome don't matter as long as we actually obtained something from it. In this case, it's the experience and the memories which we obtain throughout the process.

Also, there are groups of people who say that family is the most valuable things in our life. They are the ones who brought us up and they are the ones whom we can actually find and go to if we are facing problems and trials. I believe that most of the people who went away from their family for a period of time would realise this particular fact.

Finally, there are people who takes friendship as their most valuable asset. They have a perception that friends are one of the most important thing in our life as they are the one who are closest to us despite of our family members. Therefore, they are one of the most important things in our life

Now, the biggest question is actually this. What is actually MY valuable things in my life? Frankly, I do not know. At some point of time, I say that it is the experience that matters. After some time of thinking, I do feel that experience without outcome is also useless as in the end, it's still a failure. That's where I'm now in a dilemma in this particular matter. Well, that's life. The only way to get the answer is to get out of life. Which means, R.I.P. Hahaha.

-Signing off-

Why bother to look for the supposed heaven?
Because of you, I no longer want to wander off
I'd rather be ordinary and it doesn't matter if i don't possess anything
When I have you in my heart
It's already heaven

P/s :- I do realise that I've been starting to look into the meaning of everything that is happening to me nowadays. Perhaps the meaning of things is actually the most important thing in life?
Posted on 3:14 PM by Jefferychan and filed under | 2 Comments »

Half way through

As written in the title, yes! I'm half way through my semester now that it's the 9th week of the entire trimester and well, I think things had been going pretty well for these days (if it hadn't been well, you'll see me blogging very often) But to summarize what happened for the past 1 week, actually nothing happened. lolz. perhaps that's why there's no post at all but I'm forced to post here to prevent my blog from dying off. I think this time, I'll let the pictures do the talking for the things that had been happening for the past weeks. Am just too lazy to put it into words

Kampar being an easy going town, we are getting crazy like this =)
But I must say, the scenery here is superb!

Some of the group photosSeems that I need to start 'introducing' some of the friends I got to know here in UTAR already. Well, I'll leave it for the next post.

-Signing off-

Tiada lagi kata cintamu
Takkan lagi ku bersama mu
Biar ku simpan semua
Kenangan ku bersamamu

Posted on 2:02 AM by Jefferychan and filed under | 1 Comments »


I was so confident in my paper just now. I thought that I can score the paper 70/70 and I came to realise that I made a terrible mistake in my exam. With just one concept wrong, I lose 6 marks already.


Seriously, I'm speechless. In computer, I get crappy paper and I'm expecting it not to be good. Now, in economics. I get one of the easiest paper and again, I screwed it.

Disappointed, especially with myself.

-Signing off-

The only reason that I can smile
Is by looking at your smile all the time

Posted on 3:34 PM by Jefferychan and filed under | 1 Comments »

Hectic weeks

The sky now is crying, shedding tears upon mother earth. Perhaps the sky feels what am I feeling now. Perhaps because of that, I tend to think into that particular matter again.


As the title, I've been very busy for the past 2 weeks with exams and assignments and well, I believe that it'll continue for the next few weeks as the final assignment would be handed in, maybe in around 2 weeks time? But I'm blogging here just to tell my readers that well, Jeffery is still alive and is fighting to strive for the best.

Some of the TB-sixers
To make readers worry (or not even a single bit). Due to my over-hardworking-ness. I think I've gotten myself into the word 'flu' again. Hopefully it's not the H1N1 flu cause I'm going back to ipoh later to spread my flu. Things should be alright though but I pity my class. I think 1/4 of them are having the same problem all thanks to the assignments and test. Grrr...

My Public Speaking talkshow group
Having my econs exam later and well pray for me and right after that, I'm going back to Ipoh's stadium! Will have the night there and going back to Kampar on saturday morning. Great, I think I know how dead tired I'll be on saturday.

-Signing off-

Drizzles falling from the sky,
Sadness appears by and by;
Hopefully, when the time comes by,
We wouldn't have to say good bye.

Posted on 8:20 AM by Jefferychan and filed under | 1 Comments »